uninspired

“Walang Iwanan.”
A promise said before.
A promise made by different individuals
that understands each other.
We call them FRIENDS.

A lot of troubles
had been triumphant.
A lot of tears
had been poured.
A lot of people
had been let go.
A lot of smiles
and hope it won’t go.

But things aren’t permanent they say.
Today we’re friends,
Tomorrow were enemies.
We can’t be like this.
Pretending nothing’s goin’ but instead there is.

Look and open your ears for in my words are things comes from within.

He was on my dream, again. Hindi ko alam kong bakit ko siya napapanaginipan. I won’t deny the fact that he is my crush but am i this obsessed on him?

We are on the same room. A room that belongs to a big and modern house. Where? I don’t know. Hindi ko alam kung anong event ‘yun pero I know there’s a party happening in there and we are part of it. In the room are four people including me. On the sofa is a girl that has a long hair, payat siya but beneath in her green and white striped t-shirt she’s wearing is her sexiness. On her left, id a guy, with a white shirty and some printed blue letters on the center. His hair is styled using wax, he looks nice. I’m gonna say charming. Facing the white shirted guy is me. Sitting on a soft, comfortable balloon chair. I am wearing my yellow t-shirt, that has an illusion of a necklace. On my left, is “HIM” -my crush. He’s wearing his gray and pink striped polo shirt. He is also sitting on the same chair as mine.

The three are all 1-BCNA, meaning they are classmates but I is 3-BCNA and I dont know what am I doing there hanging and bonding with them. Laughter and giggles filled the room as the three talked. I noticed that the girl calls my crush as “KUYA J.A”. What a sweet voice she has.I observed them. I observed him. Saw how he laughs and reacts on their topic. I am staring. His hair is nice, he either used gel or wax on it. His silky black and ruggedly styled hair makes him a boy-nxt-door-type-of-a-guy. His eyes that is so endearing. Looking at it, it’s as if you are being hypnotized. You can see his soul beneath his eyes. Expressive eyes. The eyelashes added more color on his eyes. What a charming and adorable human being. Cute are his nose. Para bang it is inviting me na pisil-pisilin ko ‘yon. The red pouty and tempting lips that is ready to kiss and to be kissed. The smile tha makes my world stop. So innocewnt and young. His baritone and not-so-matured voice. I love hearing his sexy voice. When I hear it, it brings me up to the clouds and there are angels singing. It soothes up to my soul. Oops! I almost forgot the moles on his face. One on the cheek and the other is ubove his left eyebrow. those little black moles make him hot and unique from everyone. It added more on his appeal, charisma and sexiness. The shoulders that is ready to be leaned anytime. It is safe out there. I wonder when I can feel that shoulder.

I’m going to the room and suddenly I stopped. It is not because of the people around me that caught my eyes but those familiar faces that are talking on the stairs. Si J.A ay nakatalikod sa akin kaya hindi niya ako nakikita. He is facing the beautiful girl. The green and white striped shirted girl can see me because he is facing in my direction. They are talking and laughing at the same time. Ang sweet nila. My knees are becoming weak and I think anytime I will fall. The moment is becoming awkward and tears are slowly forming in my eyes.The girl saw me when I put my hand on the pader to keep me standing. I heard “Puwede ba tayong lumabas sometime?” he said. WHAAAT? Parang may bumuhos ng isang baldeng malamig na tubig sa akin at nanigas ako sa kinatatayuan ko. Hindi kang ‘yon may tumarak pa sa puso ko na kutsilyo making it to break and bleed. Para akong nauupos na kandila. I ran back to my friends. I did my best to hid what I am feeling. I sit then I lay. A tear is running on my cheek although I controlled it to not to pour. I sob. That is the time my friends come to comfort me, asking me what happened. When I rise my head to my surprise she is there, looking at me.. The green and white striped shirted beautiful girl.

Then, I wake up, and my cheeks are wet. I cried.

—THE END—

i was never been fascinated this much my whole life. Why are you doing this to me?

We was supposed to go home. We just had a little chit-chat and clearing things out for tomorrow’s Christmas party. And out of nowhere YOUappeared. There you are walking with your friends along with your body bag and red and yellow stripes shirt. My world stopped. Smile is slowly flickering in my face. And it showed up! The Smile, My Smile! The Smile that’s always been the evidence that my crush passed by. Passing through me, I observed him again. He looks haggard, Oily is his face and look how he walks he is adorable. Cute as ever. I followed them by my eyes until they gone.

What an unbelievable and miraculously day. Because I thought I’m not gonna see him because it is already Christmas break but you know, Luck is with me.

God wants me to be happy because he keeps on sending my crushes on me. This is really my most coolest and memorable Christmas EVER! Heheh =D

I am sorry I panicked.

I went to school today to pass my requirements on literature. As I am completing my work, I was shocked becauseVanessa(my Number 2 crush) is with Ate Joy! I panicked, starstruckrather and they are heading my way. “What will I do?” i asked myself, too late to run because she was already at my face.  “Hi, Allen!” she said and I reply “Hello.” Honestly, I didn’t know what to do that time. Blood rise to my face, a lot of blood for real. Around me was my classmates shouting and teasing me. I am blushing more. I can’t even looked in her eyes. Heart of mine beat steadfastly as she sat right beside me. “Di ba Allen gusto mo siyang i-add sa Friendster?” Ate Joy said. I placed my hand in my bag, hoping to grab my cellphone but my cp wasn’t there. Vanessa said “Ako na lang mag-aadd sa’yo.” while getting something in her bag. But I insisted and told “Ako na lang po, sulat mo na lang dito, wala kasi yung cellphone ko e.” So she wrote her e-mail address in the paper that I am holding actually it is the xerox of my chapter test in Literature because of panicking that is the only thing that I can provide for her to write her address. Still blushing, she bids goodbye and I said bbye too.

hehe..

so happy! =D

I saw him again. Thought I will not see him today keeping the thought that it is the last day of the classes this year. But at the corner of my mind he is just late and will be their soon. I was there at 12:00 waiting for him to come out but to my dismay, no show. Until my teacher arrives at 2:00 he is still not there.

Inside the room, I can’t focused my mind in the lecture. It is like my mind is on somewhere and was blown by the cold breeze. It is obvious where my mind is. It is in the another room. While in the room, I wrote on the blackboard what I recited, I used chalk. My hands is full of white powder and I decided to wash my hands on the bathroom. As I shut the door, I’m planning to peek on their room but my plan didn’t work because there are a lot of 1-BCNA beside the door that’s why I go in again in the classroom. But my eyes glanced again on the room and I saw that it is not like the last time I saw it. The quantity of the students on the room increased. Hope flickers in my heart.

Now, I really can’t concentrate because I am so excited to see if he is there. As my teacher said “Class your dismissed.” I run as fast as I can on the door and see if he is their. I didn’t see him quickly what I see was my classmate’s crush. But I didn’t give up. I try on his seat he is not there. On every corner of the room he is not there also. As my eyes stare on the front, I said to myself that hair is familiar. And BOOM! that guy with the familiar hair is him. I didn’t recognized him because he is facing away to me. What he is doing is copying! hahah He is copying I guess an assignment. My classmate even stated “Bawal mangopya.” making fun of him. I just smiled and giggled. What a view. heheh

Not long enough, they are getting out on their room. He is coming out. What a handsome being. So gorgeous. He looked at me, even it just a flicker. Thought I was gonna melt right there like an ice cream. I have a friend that know his classmate. He is there, beside his friend. Beside of his friend is my friend and I was just beside of my friend. Do you imagine how close are we? He is walking and walking, He just can’t stop walking. And by that action he passed me by. So close, very close. Our uniform touched each other. Think I’m gonna die with happiness. hahah

Like the other meetings, I stared at him.Stare like there is no tomorrow.  But this time, observing him in a close range. I get the chance to observe him. His face, His built, Him. And I saw his mole right on his cheek, so cute. haaaaaay… I’m gonna faint. heheh
Their group was the first one to take on the stairs. Because I want to see him, I drag my friends and we followed them. My eyes just can’t looked away to a human being that was blessed with a good face. Every action and every details he did I saw. I felt like a detective that time. He really is cute. *kilig* But they stopped at 2nd floor where they went to bathroom I will not follow them there too noh? I will be obvious if I did that. So I just bid goodbye to him actually I just bid on the air hoping he will hear it. heheh

That is how my days full of dreams finished. =P

My Christmas and New Year is now complete as early as now. hahah. They are my gift from God. heheh. =D

Happy Holidays Guys! Love you all.

I didn’t saw Vanessa (my number 2 crush) ahuhuh.. I miss her. She didn’t showed up and my number 5 crush. Hate him. He is not with robi huhuh but I am still happy. So happy for what happened.

*drop some comments*

*comments naman dyan* ^^,

I got his name already. para-paraan lang ‘yan. =D

December 8, 2008

It is the start of the College of Computer Science week. I, together with my classmates attended the parade for the opening ceremony. By that time, i saw already my 2 crushes (1 of those is Vanessa(Number 2), a Mr/Ms CCS contestant). While on the parade, I thought my number 1 crush is not there. Because in the circle of the green t-shirt guys, I didn’t see him. But when the line turned around, I saw him. He’s wearing that gray-pink stripes t-shirt again and on his shoulder is a basketball uniform colored white and yellow. He’s as charming as ever.

As usual, my eyes didn’t take off of him. We finally arrived at school, and I was just behind of him.Just inches away. So close, yet so far. That time I felt was unexplainable. He made my day complete by just seeing him.

Haha. He is a basketball player and he’s gonna play at the tournament. The first thought that came to my mind was to see the name at the back of he’s uniform. And voila! I got it!.

CLUE: At the top he’s number is 1*, and below is 2*.

->to be continued….

from tuesday to thursday (dec. 2-4) i saw my crushes. not just one but all of them!

in the hallway of both building 3 and building 2. in the administration building. in the rooms. in the campus. all over the place. i can see them.

and i loved the view. =D

holding a laptop, wet hair, their shirts are colored gray and pink. my favorite colors. waaa… i’m out of my knees. =p

and all of them looked at me. shocks! i feel like I’m in heaven at that time.

among of them there’s this someone that is above of them. and he’s my ultimate crush.

i want to thank him because he inspires me without he’s knowings. i can smile without even a cause, unconsciously. and it’s not fake for your information. even if i wanted to put away that smile, i can’t because the more i resist the more it goes more.

ewan ko ba kung bakit ako nagkakaganito. ang saya-saya ko talaga pag nakikita ko siya. grabe talaga. hindi ko ma-explain. he brings me joy. and ano naman kung i like a guy? what will i do? heart can’t be taught and forced. nararamdaman na lang un. hahah =D

i’m looking forward of seeing you again.

->my heart beats you.

can’t wait for the PAGEANT NIGHT.